Confessions From A Recovering #Girlboss: How To Break Free From Hustle Culture

As much as millennials get some serious flack online from both the older generations and the Gen Zs…

I am proud to be a millennial.

We’re the bomb!

⚡We’re innovative
⚡Hard-working
⚡ And our experience in the workforce both pre and post the rise of social media makes us super savvy.

But what is one not-so-great thing we probably all have in common?

We’re all probably victims of #GirlBoss culture.

😬 😬 😬

Girlboss culture or “hustle culture” or whatever you want to call it is the notion that:

💪🏻 If you just work harder it will all work out.
💪🏻 The internalized idea that we should be working ALL. THE. TIME.
💪🏻 And that rest is a reward for good, hard, work.

So now you have a generation of brilliant people who are fucking TIRED.

Some of us have even been burnt out.

And I don’t use that word lightly, my friends. 

If you’ve been following along with my work for a while you’ll know that I went through a 6-month burnout pretty recently.

I talked all about my entrepreneur burnout in this post. 

But for my wonderful millennials who are constantly working to recover from #GirlBoss culture, I wanted to put together a list of reminders for you.

‘Cause remember - you’re fucking GREAT at your job. 🧡

But you are NOT your job.

Despite what the world has told us throughout our entire careers.

You are a human being…NOT a crazy workaholic emotionless robot. 🤖 🤖 🤖

So without further ado - let’s dive into my best tips for a recovering #GirlBoss. 👇🏻👇🏻

#1: Have Healthy Boundaries

Listen - this tip has probably been the hardest to implement for me. 

But it has also been the difference between loving my job and HATING my job.

And anyone who knows me knows - I L🧡VE what I do.

I seriously wouldn’t trade it for anything.

But I had to learn this lesson the hard way…

If you don’t have good work-life boundaries, you will hate both your job AND your life.

And I’m gonna be honest - I take HUGE inspiration from the Gen Z TikTokers I watch on the regular.

Gen Z…y’all have an amazing ability to take zero shit. 👊🏻💥

I am inspired by the Gen Z’ers out there speaking their mind, asking to be treated with respect, and walking away from whatever doesn’t serve them.

And so, to my recovering Millenial Girlbosses, take some inspo from Gen Zs. ✅ ✅ ✅

Set some firm boundaries around your time and energy.

And stick to them!

Here are two ways you can set some boundaries. 👇🏻

🗓️ Set Boundaries Around Your Time 🗓️

I feel like this is the most self-explanatory one but it’s always good to get a reminder.

But set some boundaries around your time. 🗓️

This can be as simple as marking yourself as offline on the evenings and weekends.

Or maybe even setting a boundary with clients about when they can expect to hear back from you. 📱📱

I’ve even seen some online business owners go so far as to have separate devices for work and life.

That way it’s not a matter of ignoring a work email or slack message - they don’t even have to see it in the first place. 🙈🙈🙈

This can also look like being clear about how much time you’re willing to spend on certain tasks.

For example…giving your clients a heads up about how long a meeting will be.

That way, if you start to run overtime, it gives you the agency to say:

“It looks like we're running out of time, but I would be happy to schedule another meeting to circle back to this.”

Because I don’t know about you - but I find it hard to assert boundaries around my time at the moment.

So this trick is a lifesaver for me! ⚡⚡⚡

Just remember - your boundaries are only as strong as your commitment to them.

 Stick to your scheduling boundaries, my friend! ✅

💰 Set Boundaries Around Your Money 💰

Does anyone else find talking about money SO awkward sometimes?

If you do, it’s totally normal.

But this fear and discomfort around talking about money can make it so hard to maintain healthy boundaries around HOW and WHEN we get paid for our work. ✅ 💰

So before you run into money trouble with a client, you need to think about the logistics of getting paid.

And then you need to communicate that!

Don’t be afraid to tell your clients your preferred method of payment and when you expect to receive that payment.

You should probably even let them know what happens if ever you don’t get paid on time.

Listen…I get that you don’t want to talk about the worst possible scenarios with clients. 🧡 🧡

But start thinking about money as a way of putting a value on your precious energy.

So be clear about how you want your finances to be handled within your business.

You need to have these boundaries to protect your energy! ✅

#2: Stay Professional

One of the quintessential millennial experiences is working in some sort of unconventional workplace.

➡️ Whether it’s working at a startup
➡️ Being self-employed
➡️ Or even working at some fancy office that has beanbags and candy dispensers and Pajama days.

And this has only been exaggerated by the pandemic.

Suddenly our workplaces became even more unconventional.

✨ Our kitchen tables.
✨ Our balconies.
✨ Hell - maybe even our beds.

But if you are truly committed to healing yourself from burnout I am begging you to keep your professional life ‘professional’.

What do I mean by this? 👇🏻👇🏻

Remember your corporate days where you actually had to put on an outfit and leave the house and converse with real human beings?

Feels like a long time ago, I know. 😬 😬

But treating your work life with a certain level of professionalism is actually good to help create a separation between work and life.

Because yeah - being casual is cool and all. But when your brain doesn’t sense the difference between work mode and life mode, it makes it that much more difficult to turn off!

You will always be slightly in work mode. Yes, even during your time off. 

Here are two things you can do to help you keep that divide between your personal and professional life. 👇🏻

☀️ Have a Morning Routine ☀️

At first, I wanted to call this tip “dress to impress” but then I remembered that I basically wear sweatpants on the bottom during all my calls and videos. 😅

But the point I’m trying to make isn’t necessarily about having a cute outfit.

⏰ It’s about marking the start of the workday. ⏰

And that is why I highly recommend having a solid morning routine where you “get ready”.

So yes that might be putting on a cute outfit and maybe even a little *mascara*.

But it could also just be making your bed, washing your face, and having a bowl of cereal before you sit down to work. ✅ ✅

Just dedicate a little time to preparing yourself before you start your day.

That way you’re not “getting ready” in fits and spurts throughout your workday.

Your brain will appreciate having that clear transition from your “morning routine” to your “workday” even if it’s all happening from the comfort of your own home. 🏠 🧡

💻 Create a Distinct Workspace 💻

I am a firm believer that your workspace is sacred.

Your workspace should be somewhere you feel focused and productive.

✨ It doesn’t need to be fancy! ✨

Because yeah - while you are technically allowed to work from anywhere…

Try to be intentional about where you work! 💻

When you work from your bed or from your couch, your brain starts to think of those places as “workplaces”.

Ever wonder why you might not feel relaxed when you get into bed after a long workday from your own bedroom?

It’s because your brain doesn’t realize your workday is done! 🧠 🧠 🧠

I’m super lucky to have a beautiful office set up that I am super proud of, but it doesn't need to be complicated.

Not everyone has the space or the resources to create that physical separation.

Start small.

You might want to have a notebook that is specific to whatever project you’re working on! Or use work apps *exclusively* on your work computer.

A symbolic “workspace” - if you will.

Whatever works for you, my friend. ✅ ✅

But try and commit to working in a location that is dedicated to working.

Your brain needs help knowing when it’s “work time” and when it’s “life time”! 🧠 🧡

#3: Rest and Recover

This might be an obvious one, but in order to recover from girl boss culture, you absolutely MUST rest.

I am giving you permission to rest. 🧡

Not because you’ve worked hard.

You don’t need to earn rest.

You get to rest just because. 🧡

Now if you’re anything like me - this is the hardest thing to unlearn about hustle culture.

I always find myself saying:

“Ugh - I didn’t do anything productive today, what a total waste 😫”

And whenever I catch myself thinking like that I have to remind myself:

“Amber. Just because you weren’t productive doesn’t mean you had a bad day.”

Because the days where you don’t get anything checked off the to-do list are often the days where you:

✅   Ate some delicious food
✅   Watched something that brought you joy
✅   Spent time catching up with someone
✅   Went outside
✅   Helped someone out
✅   Got a well-needed sleep-in

And let me just remind you…NONE of the above things are a waste of time. 🙅🏻‍♀️ 🙅🏻‍♀️ 🙅🏻‍♀️

But if just like me, you’re struggling to prioritize rest in your busy life I challenge you to schedule it in.

I’m serious! 🧡 🧡 🧡

When I get really busy - I have to force myself to rest by putting it on my calendar.

“Sunday 2-5pm: RELAX GIRL”

Because sometimes life is just that crazy - but if you don’t rest, life will catch up to you.

And yeah…rest might be lying in your bed with the lights off in a big hoodie binging your favorite Youtubers. 

But sometimes rest is also cooking a healthy meal, putting in a load of laundry, and going for a walk while listening to the new Harry styles album.

Both of those things can be restful and neither of them are better than the other. 🧡

I know it might sound preachy - but if I can stop one more recovering girlboss from becoming burnt out then I am willing to risk it.

I’m gonna say it one more time 👇🏻

Rest, rest, rest.

(Ok, that was three more times, but I mean it!)

The way I see it - Girlboss culture is fuckin’ #Canceled. 🙅🏻‍♀️ 🙅🏻‍♀️

And the sooner we start protecting our energy the better.

The best part?

The better we get at setting boundaries, having a divide between the personal and professional, and resting - the better we will be at our jobs. 💃🏻 💃🏻 💃🏻

Take it from me!

Once I realized that I was experiencing burnout and started *actively* working to recover, my creative energy skyrocketed. 🚀 🚀 🚀

And both my personal and professional life benefitted!

I actually had the most amazing conversation all about this stuff on my friend Michelle’s Kiss My Aesthetic podcast.

She and I had SO much to say about the death of #Gilrboss culture. ⚡ ⚡ ⚡

And if you liked this blog I would highly recommend checking out the 4th part of our conversation on my Youtube Channel.

And if you want to stay up to date on all the best ways to have a powerful and sustainable online business - then stick around! ✅

Be sure to subscribe to my channel so you never miss a beat.

Take care and good luck out there, my friends!

Bye for now, 👋🏻

Amber

WATCH THE YOUTUBE VIDEO 🎥